Let me ask you this. Is it getting hotter where you are? Feeling the heat? Is your tiny Pacific island slowly disappearing beneath the rising seas?We're all blaming carbon emissions, Arizona size holes in the ozone layer and bovine flatulence. Did you ever stop to think that this all might be due to the stunning decline in the number of pirates? Of course not. You're all blinded by Big Media and Al Gore's comb over.
This graph clearly establishes the correlation between the rapid decline in pirate population and rise in global temperature. Never mind that every non-retarded person knows correlation does not make implicit cause. Just roll with it here, ok genius?
Now please think hard. When was the last time you saw a pirate? Johnny Depp and his oh-so-ambiguous Jack Swallows with his GUY-LINER doesn't count. Nor do those marauding morons off the coast of Somalia. It's clearly understood that REAL pirates use swords and cannons, and to a lesser degree trained attack monkeys. They do not use machine guns and RPGs. Also, no pirate worth his salt would be caught with his scurvy ass in a powered monstrosity. No, pirates only ship on sail powered conveyances.
I'd very much suggest you checking out this FANTASTIC website: http://www.venganza.org/
All I am saying is this. If you think this is ridiculous, try reading Genesis. Or listening to Genesis.
Either way, you'll get a good laugh.
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